Sometimes all you need to do is Talk.

Today was a very stressful day. But not a bad stress...a good stress. Today I had to have a talk with my boss. Usually you think uhho my boss wants to talk to me I'm in trouble...but today was different. Today I wanted to talk to him. I've been feeling very not motivated to do my job this year...and part of last year. I think a lot of it has to do with moving from the main office to my home. I know that sounds wonderful but I really miss the interaction with people. I really do. I like saving the money on gas and tolls...I like not having to miss work because of weather and I really like not having to drive at least 40 minutes one way. I love it! I miss talking to people...I know I talk to people all day on the phone but that is business related...not friendly how's it going? So I was feeling very down about my job. I used to be so good at it. I was the second highest sales person in the company last year and we do have a pretty big company. Lately I've been taking so many days off and I just don't want to be at work. So I had to tell my boss. At first he went on the defense because I basically said I don't get anything from him. Then he asked me what I wanted from him????? Well I didn't have an answer. I wanted more encouragment. I like to hear you are doing a very good job! It's always good to work on what your not doing well at too. I just want to hear that I'm not a bad sales person. I also need to work on my quality. That means I have to pay attention better and not just work for the sale. Even though it seems like I'm not doing that sometimes. I felt much better after I talked to him. A two hour converstation but it was well needed.

Also last night my good friend Micah....picture below...

(This was us at Christmas a couple of years ago)

We had a very good converstation about relationships, God, and different religions. It's amazing how much you learn about yourself and about other people talking about God. Which of course I already knew that...but there are things I don't agree with that he believes and there are things that I believe that he doesn't agree with. That doesn't mean either one of us are right or wrong. I really think if you believe it in your heart and you feel it's right...then that's what your going to believe. I mean that in a good way...not somebody who worships satan and feels that it's completely right. It's just little petty stuff that we disagree on. I'm sure it matters...and I'm sure one day we'll figure out the whole truth. I think if he knew the WHOLE truth...we wouldn't search out for God and look onto Him for answers...that's why we don't know everything.

I'm going to step on some toes here....but well it's my blog so I can. I remember working so hard at being perfect when I was at Bethany. I remember everytime I did something wrong I felt like I was going to hell! I mean...its great to strive for perfection...I don't disagree with that...but when you are at the point in life when you think you've reached it....you are way off. When you think that highly of yourself...it's time to take a new look in some different areas.

I know in my life...there are plenty of things wrong...and sometimes it seems like there is no point in living because everything I do is wrong. Then it's time to remember that you need to pick up your head...brush yourself off and get back on the ride.

I think setting little goals in life is a big help for this. So I wanted to share some of my goals...which sometimes I need a kick to remember them!

1. Get my weight under control.
- Which I've been doing a good job at...but I can do a better job. I need to exercise more.

2. Get back to school.
- Thankfully for Tim Benyo that's in the workings right now. I need to go get a degree and get a job that I like. It might take a while...but I'm working on it.

3. Figure out exactly where I stand in the way of religion.
- I will probably never know EXACTLY where I stand...but I feel like I'm standing on a big chunk of ice right now...that's not a good place to be.

4. Start looking for a good guy.
- I know it seems like a stupid goal...but when all you've been dating is losers and freaks...it's a goal!

Ok well I shared some of mine! I hope you all had a nice read. Feel Free to comment!